I now realized where I was wrong. Why I wasn't moved and happy whenever someone complements me; or whenever I see some star, like, heart or comment notifications on my social network. Why I am not motivated even though I have read several self-help/motivational books; Or why am I not contented in spite of all my hullabaloo about having time alone to think and reassess myself and my supposed "realizations" during those trips. I now know why... I was in too deep with the thought of making an impression and showing off to people who don't know me just so I could gain their "likes". I got too greedy...
I got the chance to travel and be alone. To think deeply in a place where no one knew me. It really helped me appreciate things more. I realized that there's more to life than what I am seeing at the moment. There are still good things that's happening and I should be thankful for those.
It has been, what... 11 years since you went Home. Sorry for everything... Sorry if I disappoint you. Sorry if I am not visiting you at Church... There're a lot of things I am sorry for. Unmentionable stuff... But I still hope I am making you proud in some way.
Gusto kong maligo sa ulan. Nais kong iiyak lahat ng sakit, takot, pangamba na aking nararamdaman. Nais kong umiyak hanggang sa wala na akong maiiyak pa. Hanggang sa patak na lang ng ulan ang patuloy na aagos sa aking muka.
I am broken. I have a lot of insecurities. I have mood swing patterns that is very difficult to fathom. The previous relationship I was at, left me confused, scared and worried. Confused because it was not what I was expecting. My expectation wasn't that high. But I thought relationships were supposed to be give... Continue Reading →