Breaking down. The walls I've destroyed steadily creeps back up again. The confidence and mindset I've created is slowly crumbling down. Caging me into and endless spiral of self-deprecating thoughts. The "realization" was short lived and feels more like a dream than a fact. Late night musings and moments of self-doubt. Got back to questioning... Continue Reading →
I got the chance to travel and be alone. To think deeply in a place where no one knew me. It really helped me appreciate things more. I realized that there's more to life than what I am seeing at the moment. There are still good things that's happening and I should be thankful for those.
It has been, what... 11 years since you went Home. Sorry for everything... Sorry if I disappoint you. Sorry if I am not visiting you at Church... There're a lot of things I am sorry for. Unmentionable stuff... But I still hope I am making you proud in some way.
I just feel like I can do better somewhere else. I don't know if my mindset is the one to blame here... I really am lost. I've been debating whether to leave or stay.
With a smile and a plastered on mask of self awareness, it feels like I am cheating and faking myself… Others may see me as a practical or logical person when in truth, I don’t even know what I am doing. Who Are We Sometimes I wonder where
I have been feeling lost and down lately. Well, not lately, lately, but for some time now (meaning when I turned 23 years old). I always blame it on my inability to be satisfied with where or what I am right now and my never ending envy of others.
We often say things when we are angry that we later regret. That is why I developed a habit of counting or pausing before I respond to someone that's getting into my nerves. That way I wouldn't regret anything afterwards.
"What are you doing? No, really, what do you want to do with your life. You're almost halfway with the average human life span and you still haven't found yourself yet. What do you honestly want with your life..?"
Okay, this will be a short one. Just needed to share this ASAP so that my mind would not talk me out of the decision I have made. This has been on my mind since 2017 began. That I will make 2017 my #TravelYear without regrets filling it with memories. Never once in my life... Continue Reading →